Maggie's tips for living together

Shared living as a neurodivergent (ND) student can be both supportive and draining, often at the same time. Many students expect housemates to become instant friends or to effortlessly fall into smooth routines, but the reality is usually more chaotic. When you add ADHD, autism, or other forms of neurodivergence to the mix, the challenges can feel amplified. 

Managing sensory overload

One of the biggest challenges for many ND students is managing sensory overload. Student houses are rarely quiet, and people have different expectations for noise and general activity. Instead of trying to tolerate everything silently, it helps to communicate early.

A simple flat meeting about quiet hours and shared responsibilities can prevent weeks of tension. Many ND students avoid these talks because they worry about conflict, but in practice most housemates appreciate direct and honest conversation.

Executive function

Another common challenge is executive dysfunction. Shared spaces often come with expectations around cleaning, dishes, bins, and sometimes bills. On bad days, even basic tasks can feel impossible. A practical workaround is to use “body doubling” with housemates. Sitting in the same room while each person focuses on their own chores can reduce the mental barrier to getting started. It doesn’t need to be formal. Saying “I need to tidy the kitchen; fancy doing your bits at the same time?” often does the trick.

Routines also help stabilise attention and mood. Doing weekly groceries together becomes both an accountability tool and a low-pressure bonding activity. It encourages healthier food choices, reduces the stress of planning, and prevents repeated last-minute takeaways. Some students even batch-cook as a group once a week, which saves energy and keeps the house functioning when everyone is stressing with deadlines.

Social battery

Social energy is another important area where neurodivergent students usually find themselves struggling. Shared living doesn’t mean being “on” all the time. Setting boundaries early helps protect downtime. Letting housemates know that your closed door means you’re recharging avoids misunderstandings. At the same time, gently joining low-effort social moments, like watching a show together or making tea in the kitchen, can really build connection without draining you.

Ultimately, shared living becomes easier when you treat the house like a team rather than a random collection of people. Clear communication, predictable routines, and small cooperative habits create stability. For neurodivergent students, these structures don’t just make the household work; they make university life more manageable and far less overwhelming. You can find more advice on shared living in our other ResLife blogs.